underestimator

Hi, my name is Mary, and I'm an underestimator.

I think, in general, I'm a pretty responsible, logical person. I like to plan. I like to think that I have a grasp on how the world works. But somehow, I'm still an underestimator.

I was in denial about it until we had been married about a year and my husband gently (finally) pointed it out to me. We had a joint Church calling at the time. . . ward activities committee chair people. . . which required a LOT of estimating. After about 3 trips to Costco, and the accompanying parties, for which I underestimated the food needed, even with me calling him multiple times during the shopping- me: "are you SURE we need 10 bags of hotdog buns? thats 80 hot dogs!" (as if I need to do the math for him), and him, patiently: "yes, babe. just buy them". . . he pointed it out.

I don't do it all the time, or about everything. But in general, I underestimate. This has been a hard realization for me. I used to criticize a much-loved friend about her 'logical fallacies' about things, like what people could accomplish and how fast time passes...she would expect an entire full-cast theater event to be planned and executed in only one hour, or think she could drive to the moon and back in 20 minutes. (not literally, but you get the idea). I've come to grips with the fact that I may have joined her ranks. And I am trying, through my new awareness, to adjust my perspectives/educated guesses/judgments/reasoning. . .before it gets out of control.

Some recent examples:
I underestimate-
how long it takes me to get ready in the morning
how long it takes to drive to Jonny's lab
how much foot/bicycle/bus traffic there will be on campus
how much preparation I should do for my first day of being a 'real' school SLP
the "maintenance/ongoing costs" of things ( like having a dog, or buying a car)
how long it will take to save up for a downpayment
how much food growing boys can eat
how much I can get done in one afternoon
how much reading is required in grad school
how many bananas we go through each week
how many people will show up to things
how long working from 5pm to 1am will feel
how emotional I will get about dumb things
how much money we can live off of
my loving husband also tells me I underestimate my abilities and talents and beauty (he's a keeper).

I guess lots of these examples have to do with time and money. Time is a funny thing. I think it's the ONLY thing in the whole world that we all get in exactly the same portion (24 hours), regardless of race, job status, religion, culture, class, etc... I think it's also the only thing that can seem to "fly by" and "drag on" at the same time for the same person's experience. Maybe time is just tricky and money is hard. Maybe I'm finally learning what "real life" is like. Maybe I'll just call myself a free spirit/spontaneous/don't-let-things-like-deadlines-and-bank-account-limits-bog-you-down-and-loose-perspective-of-'what-really-matters' person. Maybe I shouldn't feel bad for being an underestimator.

Anyone else out there suffering from the same disease? Any cures? Support groups?