the scrooge in me

is gone.

For some reason, when everyone starts getting so excited (weeks before thanksgiving) about Christmas decorations and music and making excuses to get their stuff out early...I'm putting it off.

I think it started when I went to college.

I'm not sure if it stems from the fact that going somewhere else for Christmas just makes me feel like its not REALLY time for Christmas until I'm home. With family. (aka on the 21st or 23rd or whenever I get there...depending on the year). Or maybe its because this is always the worst time of the semester, when finals are looming, projects and papers are due and the weather gets nasty....so listening to sentimental holiday music and seeing nostalgic movies and twinkling lights just makes me want to bake cookies with my mom, or hibernate in a huge fluffy blanket and drink a steaming mug of hot cocoa. Not exactly conducive to a lot of productivity. If that happens...I don't get any studying done.

I don't think my heart is three sizes too small.

I think my subconscious is pushing Christmas away so that I can keep my focus...desperately just hold on to my work ethic these last few weeks of cold, hard school...sans tempting thoughts about cuddling by the fire, singing carols, lights on the tree and shiny wrapping paper.

(its kinda like how i refuse to wear my big huge coats and hats and mittens, and just get by on long sleeve t-shirts and sweatshirts until i positively can't take it anymore and i have to admit to myself that its really winter.)

But this week, I couldn't take it anymore. My subconscious lost the battle. I gave in.

And I love it! I have decided to embrace the season. It only comes once a year, and won't last long. Plus, what better cause to celebrate than the birth of the Savior of the world? I spent yesterday afternoon listening to Frank Sinatra's Christmas CD and decorating our tiny tree, putting out our miniature nativity and our red candles and hanging the stockings with great care. (on the staircase, of course. we don't have a mantle yet, obviously.)

Next up: I want to make these. YUM.

ps. its snowing. just barely. tiny flurries that melt on the ground. but its still snow.

pss. hope my grades survive this decision.